I Think About You
It has been 9 years since my grandma breathed her final breath on the face of this earth. I think about her almost every day; what she would have thought of her great-granddaughters, what she would think of....well every thing. While in the shower this morning a song came on that always makes me think of her. To be honest, this years theme is song titles. Every blog title from 2020 has been a song title. This blog is no different. Fittingly, this song is from the soundtrack of a movie based on the last book my grandma ever read. The Shack.
I loved my grandma with my entire being. She was there for me when literally no one else was there. When I was young, she made all my pageant dresses and stage clothes when I began to sing. Before I'd go on stage, she'd always smile at me and say "Sparkle, sparkle, sparkle, pizzazz, pizzazz, pizzazz." It didn't matter how things turned out, she always thought it was the best. She even taught me how to sew and even helped fine tune my crocheting abilities. She tried to teach me how to read patterns, but I felt much more comfortable making things by sight.
She accompanied me to each college I attended for college tours. She and my pop-pop co-signed for all of my private student loans, supported me through my first semester of college, and allowed me to live with them rent free the year between UNLV and UK. During that year at home, they even made a point to meet me for dinner once a week, so I wasn't eating late every single night after a day of working and classes. When I was away at school, every Sunday night grandma called me and we'd discuss the week behind us and the week ahead. She and pop-pop genuinely cared and did everything in their power to help me succeed.
Even after college, I spoke with her almost every day. As a matter of fact, the last time I talked to her I was venting to her about the day I'd had at work. I don't even remember what was so bad about that day, minus the weather. I just remember it was the one time I didn't say I love you before I hung up. I almost called her back, but expected her to call me when she was done with dinner. The returned phone call never came.
The day she died, I learned my grandma had begun to crochet a blanket for Savannah. I felt bad because my other grandma had made quilts for Savannah, and I wanted Grandma Dottie to be equally represented. So I begged her to try to crochet something for Savannah, knowing her health was not what it had once been. To this day, Savannah has the swatch of blanket framed and on her wall as a reminder of the love of a woman she never met. I speak of her as often as I can, trying to keep her memory alive to my kids. I pray that they know how much she would have loved them.
I loved my grandma with my entire being. She was there for me when literally no one else was there. When I was young, she made all my pageant dresses and stage clothes when I began to sing. Before I'd go on stage, she'd always smile at me and say "Sparkle, sparkle, sparkle, pizzazz, pizzazz, pizzazz." It didn't matter how things turned out, she always thought it was the best. She even taught me how to sew and even helped fine tune my crocheting abilities. She tried to teach me how to read patterns, but I felt much more comfortable making things by sight.
She accompanied me to each college I attended for college tours. She and my pop-pop co-signed for all of my private student loans, supported me through my first semester of college, and allowed me to live with them rent free the year between UNLV and UK. During that year at home, they even made a point to meet me for dinner once a week, so I wasn't eating late every single night after a day of working and classes. When I was away at school, every Sunday night grandma called me and we'd discuss the week behind us and the week ahead. She and pop-pop genuinely cared and did everything in their power to help me succeed.
Even after college, I spoke with her almost every day. As a matter of fact, the last time I talked to her I was venting to her about the day I'd had at work. I don't even remember what was so bad about that day, minus the weather. I just remember it was the one time I didn't say I love you before I hung up. I almost called her back, but expected her to call me when she was done with dinner. The returned phone call never came.
The day she died, I learned my grandma had begun to crochet a blanket for Savannah. I felt bad because my other grandma had made quilts for Savannah, and I wanted Grandma Dottie to be equally represented. So I begged her to try to crochet something for Savannah, knowing her health was not what it had once been. To this day, Savannah has the swatch of blanket framed and on her wall as a reminder of the love of a woman she never met. I speak of her as often as I can, trying to keep her memory alive to my kids. I pray that they know how much she would have loved them.
Comments
Post a Comment