Railroad Wife, Railroad Life

July 11th is a day that has collected meaning over the last 11 years for Jonathon and I.  July 11, 2005, Jonathon started his career with CSX.  Unbeknownst to us at the time we picked our wedding date, but July 11, 1931, my Great Grandparents, Ike and Emma Roberts were married.  July 11, 2009, Jonathon and I were married. When I was growing up, every summer my Great Grandparents, Grandma and Pop Pop Roberts, would always come out to Colorado from Florida for a month. Looking back, I realize how blessed I was to not only get to know them, but to have their example set before me.  They were that cute old couple who were still holding hands and still had the light and adoration in their eyes for each other.  There's a picture somewhere of them standing in their double wide holding hands and their eyes are just twinkling and out pouring with love.  You can tell after all the years they'd been married, they were just as in love with each other that day as they were the day they

Dear Shiloh, In 2 short months your world will be completely turned upside down.  You may not know it now, but that sweet little girl inside your belly has a hole in the bottom of her back.  Don't worry, she's going to be fine and you will make it through the other side a much stronger person.  You're going to be given the option to have a surgery while that sweet girl is still in your belly.  Take it!  You're going to be given a lot of paperwork and a book that explains what Spina Bifida is and all that comes with the diagnosis. Throw it all away!  None of that literature is going to matter when you see that sweet little girl for the first time.  You're not going to thumb through the pages when she bears weight for the first time.  No amount of literature is going to prepare you for that first time she needs a surgery when she's not even 2.  Nothing in those pages will comfort you when you are faced with the reality of her finally needing a shunt.  The time wi

A week and 1 year ago today, I received my final wake up call.  Pictures from Mother's Day were posted on Facebook and I could no longer deny that I needed to do something about my weight.  My clothes were no longer fitting.  I'd actually just gone shopping for clothes for our cruise and it was so unpleasant.  I cried because clothes weren't fitting like they should unless I went up to the next size.  Even then I hated what I saw in the mirror.  I'm so thankful I had someone to help me out of my hole.  Not only has she helped me completely transform on the outside, she's also loved me where I'm at and given me some direction to grow as a person. On June 6th, it will be 1 year since I started my first 24-day challenge.  During those 24 days, I lost 12 pounds and 13 1/2 inches.  10 of those pounds alone were toxins that processed foods left in my intestines.  Since that first challenge, I've used clean eating as a guide post and continued to use Advocare p

Why are we so offendable?  Why are we so quick to excuse our own shortcomings, but condemn the shortcomings of others?  As a rule, almost everyone has a touch of narcissism within them.  Why wouldn't we though?  We are taught to look out for number one, all others be damned.  That's what society teaches us, but what about God?  I ask these questions for myself as much as anyone else.  Like the rest of the world, I struggle the "all about me" mentality.  However, I'm starting to realize that changing my attitude and giving a little grace is worth far more than self satisfaction or having the last word. The first time I heard the phrase "What the world needs now is grace", I didn't know what that meant.  I was 18 and thought grace was just something you said before dinner.  16 years later, I've started to realize grace is a wonderful gift God gives us every day.  It's also a wonderful gift He gives us so we may pass it on to others. In time

Yesterday Kennedy and I were up in Cincinnati again.  We started the day off with a renal ultrasound, followed by a VCUG and Spina Bifida Clinic.  The main purpose of the VCUG was to see if Kennedy's bladder is refluxing urine into her kidney's when her bladder is full. This was our first clinic since Kennedy's cord dethering/cyst removal and shunt surgeries.  One of the highlights was getting to see our Fetal Care Center Case Worker, Erin.  She was shadowing our Social Worker for the afternoon.  This was the first time she'd seen Kennedy with her walker.  I know I've said this before, but every single person who helped us through the decision to have fetal surgery will forever have a special place in our hearts. The urodynamics test from 2 weeks ago and the VCUG showed that Kennedy is still not completely voiding her bladder on her own.  The Urologist did say that her bladder does look much better than it did during the renal ultrasound in August and she's

We've been fortunate not to have to head up to Cincinnati for anything yet this year.  However, this trip yesterday was the first of 3 that will be made in the next month.  Yesterday morning Kennedy had a sedated MRI.  After the MRI she had a urodynamics test done and a follow-up with Dr. Stevenson, her Neurosurgeon. The brain scan on the MRI showed her shunt is draining too much fluid and her ventricles went from being too big to too small.  After the MRI we went up to the Neurosugery Department to have Kennedy's shunt reset(the magnets in the MRI machine automatically shut it off).  The Resident programmed the shunt to a lower setting in hopes that it would correct the issue with Kennedy's ventricle sizes. We won't get any of the results from the Urodynamics test until March 14th, when we go back to Cincinnati for Spina Bifida clinic. Dr. Stevenson was very pleased with the images of Kennedy's spine.  This was her first MRI since she had her cord detethering

Normally I don't talk a lot about my dad.  It will be 4 years on the 25th of this month since he passed away unexpectedly.  I still remember that day very vividly.  My husband had just been transferred from Chattanooga, TN to Danville, WV.  I was still in Tennessee and was spending the evening with my friend Star, her husband, and her mom.  I first got a phone call from my Aunt, my dad's sister.  She told me my Grandma, my dad's mom, had received a phone call from my little sister saying my dad was in emergency surgery at a hospital in Pueblo, CO.  My sister had received a call from our stepsister who was a surgical nurse at the hospital.  She had instructed my sister not to call anyone, but she called my Grandma anyway.  My Aunt said she'd called the hospital and all they would tell her was that he was there.  HIPPAA laws prevented them from telling her anything else.  While I was on the phone with my Aunt, my little sister called in.  The minute I saw her name come up